Anyone who has not been to IKEA....

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Anyone who has not been to IKEA....

Post by Reese-Mo »

Do not go, unless you want to be subject to the same methods put upon rats in a laboratory. Closest IKEA to me is about 45 miles each way, on account of me being out in the desolation.

First visit most likely my last... been renovating a few rooms. All the furniture was either really crap hand-me-down stuff, or in the case of one room "wicker" which the cats systematically destroyed. So, new floor, new ceiling fan, paint on every surface, one wall paneled in cedar, cedar molding throughout, chair rail, made a headboard and a desk for the room, but, called it quits with dressers and such. So a trip to IKEA since they have some solid wood, unfinished pine furniture, which I can modify and customize a bit and add the finish of my curvier half''s choice. She'll let me just put some PU on it, and let the pine amber and age darker (whew).

You get there, and its a free for all parking. Just grab whatever you can see open. Trust me. Get into the place, and there nothing but some samples, kiddieland, and an escalator up. That's where the fun begins. Once you're on floor #2, there's no way down except by running the maze. The floor layout zig zags thru all the modernistic furniture, both cheap, cheaper, and a bit more expensive. Probably 95 percent of what's offered is laminate on MDF. I don't mind pine if its cut well and sturdy. So you go all thru the maze, and nothing is grouped. You want the matching dresser to the nightstand? You'll have to find it, someplace, maybe behind the faux bathrooms. Every suite has a faux crapper and vanity. I felt like dropping trou and dropping a nice deuce in one of 'em. Anyway, there's furniture, but no salesman, no sales kiosk, just... nuthin. I'm trying to figure out how to actually BUY this stuff. I start grabbing snap shots with my phone.

Well you get thru the maze and at the end is a restaurant stack/bar. A leisurely pace in the fairly warm store took an hour too traverse all thru the place, with its long and winding road of basically... lowest end stuff. The idea is to wear you out, have you and the missus sit down for some Swedish viddles and discuss what you liked and didn't so you can make your mind up buying it. Cleaver.

Right next to the eatery, the staircase down. I don't know how they do this trick. I could find no wheelchair access anyplace, and no emergency EXIT signs anyplace. I dunno... At any rate, you get into a big warehouse section, now on a lower floor winding road. And since I snapped pics, I've got the price, and bin location of everything of interest. Grab a cart and head for the bins. Now you gotta sign into their system or you can't actually "buy" from them. Personal info? REALLY, for cheap ass furnishings? I faked it. Grab the items, head for the checkout and... they're charging prices over sticker price at the checkout. I ask... why is the sticker less than the cash register? Oh no, they say, its correct. No... its not. Well you can go get the sticker and bring it here, they say. I say, well I got a picture of the damn sticker, so make it right. They wanted to verify the time stamp on my phone's image. Ruthless. But I got the price I expected.

Whole IKEA experience... damn near three hours. Almost all of that marching thru the maze.

As it sits, it ate into my Sunday gun-time to the point that I didn't get a thing done otherwise.
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Re: Anyone who has not been to IKEA....

Post by GasGuzzler »

I saw one on my 600 mile round trip to New Braunfels and back yesterday. Never been close enough to go into one.
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Re: Anyone who has not been to IKEA....

Post by Arroyoshark »

IKEA is a different shopping paradigm from what you may be used to. Probably best to simply adjust to the theatre and try to enjoy it. Anybody can have a bad time if they are determined to do so. I have shopped at IKEA in Portland, OR, SLC and Denver. Catalogs, forms to record your selections and store maps are available at different spots. You are correct that a lot of IKEA products are melamine coated particle board, but there are also other products. It's not low end, not high end stuff but mostly self assemble for folks in college, on a budget or just frugal. I've been able to obtain what I was looking for and survived the experience just fine. I found staff present to answer questions, check inventory, etc. There were water fountains, elevators and restrooms (thankfully for old guy) to be found. It's been a couple years since last at an IKEA but I don't recall price increases at checkout nor a requirement for an abundance of personal information, but I use a credit card. I am neither an advocate nor an affiliate of IKEA, but it serves a purpose. The opinion you posted certainly is your personal view, but I have not found such to be a universal opinion. Sorry the store was such a bad experience for you but I don't believe forum members are supposed to post these kinds of rants.
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Re: Anyone who has not been to IKEA....

Post by mr surveyor »

I'm one of those that go "shopping" only for the purpose of satisfying a particular need. I usually want to know beforehand that the store has what I want, and preferably what part of the store, what Isle and what shelf. Then I want to know what checkout line to get in so I can leave.

I never did get into the "sport" of shopping. :)

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Re: Anyone who has not been to IKEA....

Post by Reese-Mo »

I was determined to get through the double decker maze, and that's about the best I can say.
If melamine coated MDF isn't low end, what exactly is? Cardboard?
Let me just say, when I got to Wally's for a pair of jeans, and its a trip to do so, I go, I get the damn pants, pickup maybe some engine oil or whatever, and get the hell out. They don't make me march thru ladies undies, kids socks, pet food, electronics for the masses, toys, cards and gift-wrap.... you get the idea.
Yah, its a different paradigm. I suppose the younger set is all ooh and ahhh over their stuff. Its nothing to write home about. There's a road in Ft. Lauderdale... I think its either 19th Ave or 19th Street, I forget. But there are quite a few "furniture" stores there, and they have the exact same type of furniture, just plastic coated onto wood chips.... or shall I say "engineered wood product".

This is the sorry as sin ham radio bench I just made.
20211226_105052_resized.jpg
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Bad as it is, at least its solid wood. No "MDF/engineered-wood-product"

I guess I'm just not an IKEA shopper.
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Re: Anyone who has not been to IKEA....

Post by Gunny268 »

What does "IKEA" mean in the Chinese language? I was curious cause all the boxes had made in China on them.
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Re: Anyone who has not been to IKEA....

Post by Archer »

Gunny268 wrote:What does "IKEA" mean in the Chinese language? I was curious cause all the boxes had made in China on them.
In Chinese Ikea means 'Scandahoovian Walmart'

OR in other words...

'Foreign suckers that are going to pay us for cheap crap until we own them.'
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Re: Anyone who has not been to IKEA....

Post by Archer »

And further on the IKEA note:
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Re: Anyone who has not been to IKEA....

Post by Reese-Mo »

Gunny268 wrote:What does "IKEA" mean in the Chinese language? I was curious cause all the boxes had made in China on them.
Its Swedish. Ingvar Kamprad and the town and province he lived in, which start with E and A.

Ingvar was not a furniture guru, but a damned genius with corporate structures and tax laws. IKEA is set up as a multi-national corporate group, consisting of both for-profit and not-for-profit corporations, taking advantage of all the loopholes in various countries corporate and tax laws. There are also several "foundations". Put in planer English, IKEA pays almost nothing, nada, diddly-squat in taxes to anyone on their huge profits.
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Re: Anyone who has not been to IKEA....

Post by Reese-Mo »

I'm not into "shopping" either, and like others, I want to know the store has what I'm interested in before I trudge over. Oh, I might go into a Wallyworld for a coffee maker, because I KNOW they got something that will work for me, but thats as close to "shopping" that I do.

IKEA has a line of unfinished items. I was able to check all the measurements and such from online sizing. But, you never really know the construction and quality until you see and handle things in person. A gun I can send back easy. A dresser that comes knocked down in three HEAVY boxes... not so.

The thing is, they don't put similar items all together. They got bits and pieces of "collections" all jumbled up nicely to force you to trudge all the way thru the store. I've been informed that some folks go to IKEA for lunch on the weekends, because the food and prices in the restaurant are supposed to be pretty good. I don't know, but to trudge thru that place for a hot dog and swedish meatball seems nutzo to me.

On the other hand, the unfinished wood dresser I got went together fairly easily. The instructions are three elementary school levels down from the "comic book" M-16 manual given out in the Vietnam War era. I can see how folks put this stuff together bass ackwards. On a better note, I was able to employ enhanced construction techniques (aka glued n' screwed) and the result is very solid. Dunno where I'm gonna apply finish to this behemoth - I'll have to finish the draws separately, but all in all, worth the $200 and whats gonna be 15 hours or so of assembly and finish time. Well maybe not worth my time, but I work for myself on a more or less pro-bono rate. ;)
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